I had long conversations with mother last night. She told me that u have a lot of problems in your mind but u didn't tell us. I know u dun wan us to worry for u . She said that u have bad habits of soccer betting previously. U told me in the past u used to bet and lose a lot of money and cos' your ex gf to leave u. U promised me that u will change and won't bet anymore. I believed u. But mother said that u have recently went back to soccer betting and lose quite a lot of money, maybe that is the reason why this past month u have been so stressful. I know u have good intentions.. u wanted to win more money so that we can have a better life .. but things won't work out this way. As i've told u, a lot of ppl lose money on soccer betting, not everyday is sunday.. wat we should do is continue to work hard and save up money for our future.
This morning, mother showed me ur ex gf photo. I believe is Vanessa, whom u used to love her a lot. The reason why she left u is becos of ur bad habits. But mother assured me that u have already forgotten her and u only have me in your heart. Mother said that u have told her that U LOVED ME THE MOST AND U CAN NEVER FIND ANOTHER PERSON WHO TREAT U AS GOOD AS I AM IN THE WORLD AND NO ONE CAN EVER REPLACE ME IN YOUR HEART. Tat moment i broke down and cry.. U never tell me this before.. I never know that u loved me so so much.. I'm so sorry that i doubt u when i saw different girls messaging u on the msn and facebook. I'm so sorry that i was angry with u for a moment when i found out that u flirted with girls in facebook and msn. Mother asked me to forgive u becos the reason u did that is u r bored. I know u used to flirt with girls online and asked them out for meetings. I didn't know u did that behind me while i was with u.. Lao gong, i forgive u. I know u did that out of boredom and u have no evil intentions. Mother said that u r so sad that after we married, we cannot live together as our house is not ready yet. Mother also said that u felt very bad not providing me with good life. Lao gong, i want to tell u that all these are not important, the most important thing is that u r happy being with me. I dun wan any big house or any branded goods, i only want u in my life. Even if we are poor, we can still be happy as long as we have each other. I know u always put me as number 1 in your heart. I do too ..
This morning when i wake up, i really wished i can see u when i open my eyes lying beside me. In the past when we wake up in the morning, u will give me a morning kiss and prepare breakfast for me. I felt so lonely this morning. I can't see u.. really still can't believe that u r no longer around.
Ur god sister, Ameline, visited ur grave yesterday evening with her baby girl and hubby. She broke down and cry when u sees u there.. I did ask her to be brave and strong. But i know it's difficult, cos' she loves u a lot too.. she can feel that u know she came to see u ..
Yesterday evening, your good friends, Ming Hong, Jiajia, stanley, stanley's gf and chang guo came by to your house to pay me a visit. We've talked so many things about u, about how good u r and also your bad habits. I would like to say thank u to them for keeping me company.. They are really good friends and u r a real lucky person..
Last night i waited for u. i can't sleep, really hoping to see u. But u didn't come back. My aunt said that she heard Bella laughing very loud in the middle of the night. She said that u came back to play with her and make her laugh like u always do. I'm glad that u came back to see Bella, i guess u r most worried for her..
Last night i logged in to your computer. When i opened ur picture folder, i found out that u've saved all my photos and our photos.. From the day we first met, to our zoo trip, phuket trip, bintan trip, bali trip and all our daily photos taken.. u've kept so many of me in your folder.. tat really shows how much u love me..
Lao gong, i know u like pretty ladies. Ladies with long hair, big eyes, sexy body.. I know i'm not up to that standard, but u still love me as much. U did boost to me that all your ex gfs have good figures and very sexy, it really makes me jealous. I always think, am i good enough for u? U did tell me tat i was good enough for u cos' in your eyes, i'm the prettiest and the sexiest wife.. U r the most good looking and the best husband in the world...
Not only u r a good hubby, u r a filial son too. I know sometimes u talk to ur mum in a harsh tone, but u still love her a lot. sometimes when we go out shopping, we will always buy some food for her.. when u went home late due to busy work schedules , u will call her to tell her too. U did mention to me before if u were to go outfield or overseas training for a month, i must go and visit mother every week cos' u r worried for her staying alone at home. Ur mum knows that u r filial too, she told me tat u r still a big baby in her heart.. Mother treats me like her own daughter too, this morning she went out to buy breakfast for me.. i felt so bad .. she is really a nice mother ..
Life is really so short.. Without Bella, i think i will join u up there in heaven. I can't live without u , i really need u in my life .. i just can't let go..
No comments:
Post a Comment